Learning that your spouse wants a divorce can make you experience many different emotions. Sometimes, it can even make you feel opposing ones simultaneously—heartache and relief or stress and excitement.
Spouses are eligible for divorce if they have lived in Alameda County for the past three months and in the state for the past six months. In case you did not see the divorce coming, here are a few of the first things you can do:
Calm down
Even if you feel blindsided by the request for a divorce, you need to gain the strength to avoid adverse reactions. Try to ground and compose yourself. If you do not know what to say or do, let your spouse know you will need time to process your thoughts and feelings.
Seek legal assistance
Regardless if you want to agree with the idea of divorce, reaching out to a divorce lawyer to assess your case and options can help. Consulting with a family law attorney can also help you decide how to move forward with your spouse’s divorce request.
Put your children as the top priority
Prioritizing the welfare of your children is in the family’s best interests. However, be careful not to use them as bait to make your spouse stay in the marriage. Avoid involving the kids as much as possible while regulating your emotions. When you discover that divorce is inevitable, it can help to have an amicable agreement with your spouse on managing co-parenting during and post-divorce.
Having a clear head and calm composure during this period is in your best interest. Reacting negatively might only hurt your relationship more. Reaching out to a family lawyer can help explore your options for moving forward. In addition, a professional counselor can help navigate the emotional impact of a divorce.
